21 Covid Truths
I wrote this a few weeks ago for a friend of mine. She has been sending out a newsletter (for lack of a better term) bi weekly since the Shelter In Place order came down. It’s called Refresh: Riding Out Corona and is just wonderful. I’ve been blessed to contribute a few times to it and am very grateful to Jana for that opportunity.
Since this was first published, we’ve sort of turned a corner. We are nowhere near the finish line but we’re now on the path that we know it’s on. We’ve still got a long way to go but we can do it; we’ve come this far. I wanted to share this so that we can all have a chuckle while we’re all still living it, instead of remembering it.
21 Truths that I have discovered during the Corona Virus Pandemic
1. You feel better when you wash your face, put on mascara, and put on earrings. Seriously. It’s like the day is yours instead of you just being trapped in it. And I’m not talking about your nice, comfortable studs that you love. You know the ones I mean. They are your “I’m not going anywhere special or trying to look particularly nice but still want to feel ‘dressed’” earrings. I have two pairs of them. And I love them. But not right now? Right now it’s dangle city! Wear the fancy earrings. And wear the mascara. And wash your face.
2. Amazingly with nothing to do, I can still be behind on things. I will think ‘I’ve got time to start this, it’ll be great’ forgetting that I live with three tiny people and a puppy that can immediately sense when I’m focused on something that doesn’t directly impact them. Or I have to get someone food. Or, let’s be honest, I get bored because I can’t remember the last time I had the potential for that much time to focus on something else. So, now I’ve got a couple of halfway finished projects just sitting in the midst of my kids’ school stuff. Not to mention there’s still so much stupid laundry.
3. Speaking of my kids. I love them to the point of death. And I love education. But this whole thing has confirmed that I am NOT cut out to Homeschool my children. Yeah, yeah, I know that this isn’t actually homeschooling but still. If you have to call a friend and vent because you think your kids are acting dumb on purpose just to tick you off and try to get out of the lesson, you probably shouldn’t be their primary teacher.
4. Puzzles are fun. That’s all there is to say on that. They are fun. They are engaging. And they are satisfying.
5. We could do without toilet paper. We really could. It would be a little gross and we’d never tell our guests that we used that tub as a bidet but we could make it work. However butter, flour, sidewalk chalk, and Netflix are necessities. Oh, and stamps! Because letter writing has become a serious thing in our house.
6. Masks are surprisingly hard to breathe through. And they mess with your peripheral vision.
7. Whether it’s big or small, juvenile or complex, art and creativity are so important right now. I sometimes make these elaborate, cute hop-scotches for my boys. I told them that I was going to make one and that would be their PE for the day. It took four times as long for me to create it as it did for them to run through it 3 times. But that didn’t matter. I needed to MAKE something. I knew it was going to get washed away in a couple of days but it didn’t matter. I needed that. Remember how sidewalk chalk is a necessity? You think that‘s just for the kids? Whether it’s painting or coloring in a coloring book or sculpting with clay (or Play dough) or making an elaborate letter to send, scratch that creative itch. Your day will be better for it.
8. Being able to cook is really serving us well. I know that’s bragging but seriously, we’re doing alright. It’s also providing another creative outlet. And making me try different combinations and work on new skills because we’re not going anywhere. I now have the time to wait for that dough to rise. Or that mix to chill.
9. We have a screen door on our front door. Or to be more accurate, it’s not a screen door it’s a glass door. And I have never been more thankful for it as I have been the past four weeks. My front door stays open now. Unless it’s raining. But even then, only if it’s raining hard. It’s amazing the symbolism that door has now. We keep it open. Even if we can’t go out it, it stays open. And I feel less trapped. And I think my kids feel less trapped too. My husband is still going in to work. And he’ll continue to go in. (I’m glad for him and a little jealous that he still gets to have some interaction with the “real world” if I’m being honest.) When he comes home, he shuts the door. I don’t think this is a symbolic act; I think he’s just shutting the door to our house, it’s what you do. But I’ve noticed that if my kids open it again, like to take the dog out, they’ll leave it open when they come back in. Daylight coming in, bird song, and the occasional glimpse of a neighbor. Because we aren’t trapped. We are choosing to stay in our house. And we don’t need the barricade of a door right now. At least that’s how it helps us feel.
10. A child will always need to poop when it’s time to start school. Always. And if it’s one of the twins, it’ll derail the next hour. Because I can’t start without them both. And if one goes then within the following 20 minutes, the other will have to go. I bet they’re doing it on purpose. They’ve somehow synchronized to make this distraction successful. Because you can’t get mad at a five year old for recognizing that he has to poop and then taking care of it.
11. Mark the weekend in some way. It’s important right now to have some sort of celebratory SOMETHING when we get through another week and the ‘at home work’ can stop. Mark it. Don’t do any laundry, bake something, have a movie marathon with pillows and blankets, make an elaborate meal, go for a drive and everyone takes a turn picking songs on the radio. Something. Mark the weekend.
12. Sometimes when the kids have been playing pleasantly and with great imaginative intensity, school gets postponed. They are someplace else having an adventure with a group. Problem solving and working out social situations and how to take turns. Isn’t that education too?
13. Sex is great at relieving tension and anxiety. Sex is also great when you can’t sleep because you took a three hour nap since there’s nowhere you have to be. Sex can also be great when you’re bored and need to kill some time before you have to start cooking the next meal.
14. Speaking of meals, food is such a comfort right now. Not only does it provide the body with sustenance but it helps mark the passage of time and gives you something to look forward to. It is so easy to just snack through the day but don’t. Let your hunger build so you look forward to meal time and eat with joy. Everyone is joking about the ‘quarantine 15’ and they shouldn’t be. We are actually getting to stop and be still and take our time with our food. We’re getting to finally bake that baking challenge you’ve always wanted to try. It is a wonderful thing and we need to be kind to ourselves about it.
15. Now is the perfect time to paint my house. I’ve wanted to do it for months. I’m stuck in it with hours of time at my disposal and the Sherwin Williams store is still open.
16. Now is the worst time to paint my house. I’m stuck in it with my small children and a puppy. And there would be zero chance of them not wanting to paint too.
17. The English language is stupid. I’ve been helping my five year old twins learn to read and English does not make that easy. Explain to me please why ‘have’ and ‘gave’ don’t follow the same phonetic rules. Or ‘of’ and ‘off’. It is very difficult to explain that ‘kite’ and ‘lite’ follow the same rules but ‘lite’ isn’t always the same thing as ‘light’. And I know that it’s because we’ve got a language made of words with roots in Latin and German and Greek and French and all the rest but still. U wood think that Inglish wood make more sins. But it dusn’t, probuble becuz uv all those other langwiges.
18. Despite being cut off of from all my friends, alone time has never been more important. I ran an errand the other day and the puppy was looking at me like he wanted to go. I told him ‘no’ and my husband asked “Why? He won’t be a chatterbox.” It didn’t matter. I wanted to be alone. ALONE. The puppy counts as another creature that is going to want something from me and that I’m going to have to think of. I wanted to shut that part of myself down. At least for 40 minutes. To not care about or consider another being till I walked back in my house.
19. My hand washing song is Jolene by Dolly Parton. The chorus fits perfectly. I’ve tried to use another one because when you’re washing your hands 10 times a day, the last thing you need is to keep singing about some poor woman losing her man. But alas, nothing else has stuck. So, keep singing sad lady, maybe Jolene makes the right choice and leaves your man alone after all.
20. I have vacillated between moments drenched in prayer, acutely feeling the presence of my God and moments where it doesn’t even occur to me to pray. But God is still here. And God is still good.
21. I am fairly certain that I will cry the first time I hug somebody I’m not related to when this all over. I’m pretty sure that my husband and I will take turns going out with the guys or the girls and just being together. And that our sitters will be making some serious coin because we’re going to want to eat out A LOT. But regardless, there will be aspects of this that I will miss. I know that everyone is saying that and talking about not taking it for granted but SERIOUSLY, y’all, I see the Hemni having ‘quarantined’ weekends in our future. Where we cut ourselves off from everybody else. We eat every meal in our home, cooked or brought in. And we just exist together.
For the first time, I think ever, all five of us fell asleep on the couch last weekend. We were watching TV. One thing ended so we started another. We were sharing blankets and sharing pillows and woke up around midnight. All five of us together. We had no time commitments. There was nothing we ‘had to get done’. For the first time, we were all so relaxed just BEING with each other, doing nothing, that we fell asleep. And I pray that won’t be the last time. That when this is all over we will be able to hold on to that US-ness that we’ve found. And that is precious. And it is mighty. And it is truly a gift. Because God is still good.
